I currently hate...

...dry skin and scars.
And homework involving copying up notes that I've already written once before.
And the mood that distracts me from doing said homework.
I also hate forgetting cool little moments and idea.
I hate those tempting hairs and scabs.
I hate wasting time and feeling lazy.
I hate being offered food and the fact that I can't refuse.
I hate feeling fat and putting on weight.
I hate annoying police shows on TV, the ones where they show car chases and stuff.
I hate deadlines.
I hate my perfectionism.
I hate when people do things purely for attention and get it.
I hate that horrible type of rain which seems really light but ends up getting you horribly wet.
I hate not having snow.

But most of all, I hate a certain someone.
And if I say any more I will probably get complained at, so I won't.



N.B. Hate is fleeting, so this is current hatingness.

I'm pretty lame.

I think I'm starting a new 'I can't be bothered with people' phase.
Don't worry, it's okay.  These things happen from time to time.
I'm just hoping it doesn't last too long this time.

I am far too nice,
But I'm actually horrible.
You can trust me,
But I will lie to you.
I'm told I'm a calming person,
But most of the time I'm worrying or I'm angry.
I don't like drawing attention to myself,
But I want to be noticed.
Some people say I'm strange,
But I'm a lot more normal than you think.
I'll say I'm fine,
But in reality I'm crying.

This is a bit weird.

I think I have a slight irrational fear of emailing teachers.  And people I don't know.
I think the thing with teachers is that I worry I'll write something stupid or sound rude and they'll always judge me by that email.
I think with people I don't know it's the same but also along with the whole shyness thing.  What if they don't want me to contact them?  What if they only reply out of politeness and I'm actually boring them?
I get like that with IMing as well.  I actually worry a ridiculous amount about how people I don't know and will probably never meet think of me.

I'm not a people person.

---

Dancing on the skyline,
Praying that this sunset will never end.
Here, I'm free.
And I'm safe,
Despite the risk of falling.
I'm alone but I don't care.
I can see everyone else's lives carrying on.
And that's my favourite part.

Coughing is not fun.

So, I'm ill.  As always.
I wanted to go to school today but the parentals told me not to.  But that's probably for the best.

I think a lot of people are afraid of life more than they are of death.  And afraid of finding out who they really are.
I think this includes me, but believe me, I'm trying to change that.